Bridezillas
by TigressLuver
Summary: Tigress, YES! Master Tigress is my very first Bridezilla! A preparation of a wedding can bring such stress to an ordinary girl, but watch what it can do to a master of kung fu!
1. Planner? Who?

The following is a Disclaimer for copyright; I TigressLuver do not own any material of Kung Fu Panda except for my characters. There is nothing that says I can't use them on Fanfiction, unless I buy some high tech computer and make my own movies. Thank you.

Rated T (Readers Discretion is Advised)

In this story anything that is bolded is when the characters are in the confessionals other than that they all speak normally, enjoy.

* * *

Bridezillas

The late summer morning air was damp and rather moist at the same time. The sun just then peeked out from under the mountains and sprayed its rays on the Valley of Peace. Birds chirped crickets went to sleep and the grasses stayed wet with dews. The morning was peaceful in the valley, but in the Jade Palace all was awakened by a screaming Tigress, who's wedding day was weeks ahead. So much had to be done. So they hired the cast of Bridezillas, knowing that this would possibly be the last time they would ever see her act so monstrous.

The ruckus first woke Shifu, he grunted as he groggily walked towards the noise. It was way too early to even be awake. The noise got louder and louder. Until it stopped.

"Tigress what is the meaning of thi-"

He paused, not even wanting to finish his sentence. Her face looked too pissed to even speak to her.

"My planner just quit! Ok? That's what happened!" She screamed.

'I don't blame them' he thought, but such thoughts might cost his life at this point.

"Why did she quit?" He asked.

Tigress paced back and forth in disbelief. "Why the hell do you thing she quit?!" she growled. She didn't even think about the way she was speaking to her master. "She thinks I'm 'too mean' what the hell does that even mean?! I'm supposed to get married in 5 weeks! I don't have a receptionist, I don't have a cake' I don't have a limo, and I don't have a whole lot of things!"

Shifu's eye violently twitched.

**Shifu: This is not the first time I've seen Tigress act this way, it's actually the second time since her sweet 16. She gave us all hell and now she's about to do it again. Thankfully I'm trained for this so as a father I do what I must do, and that is to give her whatever she wants so she can shut up about it.**

"I will get you another planner then." Shifu turned away.

"No! Get her back!" Tigress protested.

"I doubt it seriously if she would want to take you back." Shifu said.

Tigress grew red in fury, Shifu knew what that meant. "I'll see what I can do." He sighed.

"That sounds better." Tigress sneered, as she watched him walk away.

**Tigress: Ok here are the rules when it comes to me, I get whatever I want, you shut up about it, and it will be a happy day. If you cross me I will ruin your life. This event is all about the bride! And I will let no one take my spotlight. No one!**

* * *

Rin's eye blinked multiple times, before she could indicate that she was fully awake. With that, she rolled off the bed and walked out into the hallway. No one was in sight; they were probably hiding from Tigress and her bridal tantrums.

Rin suddenly heard a loud crash, followed by a scream. She found them. Her friends were enslaved by her and she was probably next. Rin was about to turn away until, Chu grabbed her and pulled her away from Tigress' sight. "What just happened?" she asked.

"Well she's making a deception design and the guys keep messing it up, Po went out with Master Shifu to get her another planner." Chu explained.

"Where is everyone else?"

"Viper is training, Mei Ling wants nothing to do with this, Aomi is somewhere in here, Zuko is love sick and whining about it and Tai Lung is enjoying the fact that Tigress is bitching every two seconds." Chu finished.

"Well I'm going back to my room." Rin called.

"Oh no you're not!" Tigress yelled from afar. "You are a Bridesmaid remember?"

"Uh no, since when did we arrange that?" Rin crossed her arms.

"Just now. Let's go." Tigress clenched her teeth.

**Rin: 3 words. What. A. bitch!**

"Right now! Let's go!" Tigress pulled Rin's arm.

Rin didn't protest she glumly followed Tigress from behind; she looked a Chu who only mouthed the words 'sorry'.

**Chu: I don't really have much to say about Tigress' aggressive attitude, but she has to know that people still need their space.**

* * *

Po and Shifu made their way through the white marble doors of a luxurious mansion. Mostly because Tigress made them go there.

"Are my guests here?" A female voice asked. Then there was whispering. The thin linen curtains whipped open, revealing a snow white wolf with carefully glossed fur, expensive clothing and her small reading glasses. "You must be Shifu, come sit please." She motioned them to the living room that had a large window showing her backyard waterfall, Shifu and po removed their shoes and sat in the poufy white chairs that surrounded the gold and crystal coffee table.

"So I understand that you need a new wedding planner." She smiled.

"Well yes, you see the other one quit." Shifu explained.

"Oh I know, but hear this I will not be considered as a replacement. I have high standards when it comes to weddings." She scowled.

"Um miss-"

"Please call me Isabelle."

"Isabelle, this is my daughter's wedding, and this will be her only one. Please if you can-"

"I can Shifu, Ray! Fetch me my portfolio!" she yelled. The sound of someone's footsteps pounded up the porcelain stairs.

**Isabelle: I am one of the best wedding planners China has to offer, I planned for celebrities, models, even sports players. No one is better than me.**

Ray came in and handed Isabelle a thick white binder, probably stuffed with photos and invitation designs. "So, when is the wedding?" she asked, flipping through the pages.

"In a few months." Po answered.

"It's fairly possible to create the wedding of her dreams, but it's going to take work; especially if she's hot tempered." Isabelle winked at Shifu.

"Very well, we shall see to it." Shifu agreed.

Isabelle smiled, and then she slammed the binder shut and stood up. "I will arrive at the palace first thing in the morning, she must be awake bright and early, I will take her to my assistant to get her things picked out then her and Po will go will me to pick out a cake the next day, afterwards she and her mother will come with me to pick out her dress. The important things will be done first."

"She only has me." Shifu corrected.

"Then find an older female she looks up to." Isabelle snapped. "This will not be easy if you don't cooperate with me."

Shifu decided not to fight with Isabelle, instead he nodded.

"Good, I'll see you tomorrow then." Isabelle smiled at Po then snapped for one of her servants to escort them out.

**Po: Man she's uptight, I hope Tigress likes her and on top of that, I hope Tigress won't fight her.**

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Look guys i'm sooooo sorry I haven't updated in months! ive been away in a place where internet is hard to reach, but i'm back so thanks for waiting for me.


	2. The Vein Above Thy Brow

It was 8am and Po made his way to the kitchen. His first stop before the day actually starts. He rummaged through the fridge, and the cupboards, there was hardly anything good to eat; so he just made some tea.

Viper suddenly slithered in, with an annoyed expression on her face. "Who is that woman in the courtyard?"

Po froze, he had forgotten all about Isabelle's visit. "She's uh Tigress' new planner."

Viper look at him for a moment, then gave him a crooked smile. "You realize she's gonna kill you right?"

"I know but, we were desperate!"

"I know the circumstances, I'll make sure tigress doesn't get too mad; not like she isn't everyday anyway." Viper rolled her eyes. "Aren't you going to talk to that lady?"

Po jumped. "Oh! Right, hehe I'm on it." He pushed open the door too hard and it smacked him back in the face, sending him to fly back with a loud thud.

"Are you ok?" viper asked.

Po jumped up like it wasn't a problem. "I'm good!"

**Viper: I'm really worried about Po, I know he loves tigress and all but I really think he's going out of his way just for one night of celebration. If that was Crane I would beg him not to.**

* * *

Tigress hopped in the taxi without question, Isabelle somehow found a way to get Tigress to do what she wanted. Finally.

**Tigress: So Isabelle is taking me and the bridesmaids to see our reception hall and to figure out how to decorate it. I kind of trust her now, but if things go wrong she will get cut off too.**

"I can't believe I'm going on with this." Rin smoshed her face against the glass window of the vehicle.

"Stop complaining." Mei Ling growled.

It wasn't long until they reached the hall. The room was huge and completely empty, the only thing that was there was the marble floors and the huge glass chandelier. Isabelle's voice boomed in an echo as soon as she spoke.

"Well this is it, now have you figured out a way you wanted it to look like?" she pulled out a pen and a notebook.

Tigress huffed. "I want it to look like the Jade Palace."

Isabelle looked at her strange. "Like how? Color wise?"

"No I want it to look like the Jade Palace." She repeated.

Everyone looked at her for a moment.

"What?" Rin asked.

"Then you might as well have your reception at the Jade Palace." Isabelle suggested.

The three bridesmaids' eyes went wide.

**Rin: Uh oh you shouldn't have said that. Now you triggered her pissed off signal.**

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Tigress raised her voice to the point where Isabelle was in shock, but she didn't back down.

"Im just saying, why won't you just have your reception at the Jade Palace if that's all you want it to look like?" Isabelle tensed.

Tigress inched closer to her. "Listen to me very carefully, this is my wedding, I am the bride! And what I say goes! So if I say I want my reception hall to look exactly like the Jade Palace, then god dammit that is what I want! You will do whatever I want! Got it?"

Isabelle seemed unphased by her quick and aggressive attitude. "Yes Tigress I do understand, please forgive my rash suggestion."

Tigress scowled at her and walked towards the door. "I won't wait long in the car. So hurry up!"

**Isabelle: This is going to be harder than I thought.**

* * *

Zuko paced back and forth in the courtyard, while Chu just stared at him.

"How long are you going to do that?" He carved a stick up to the point then threw it in a pile that seemed to look like toothpicks.

"Until Khan comes back." Zuko mumbled.

"Dude, she's gone, she isn't coming back. Just look for someone else." Chu murmured.

Zuko stopped pacing and looked at him, mostly in disbelief. "Are you out of your mind? How could you even think that?"

"Im just saying. You're a wreck dude."

**Chu: Zuko has been "single" for 3 months now because his wife left him I guess, he is getting a date for Po's wedding I'll make sure of it.**

"I can't just cheat on her!" Zuko yelled.

"Why not? You've done it before." Chu corrected.

"And that's my mistake, I learned from it." Zuko began to walk away. "By the way who is your date; I don't see you asking for one."

Chu inched up a bit. "I have someone in mind."

"Who?"

Chu smiled a bit already knowing Zuko's reaction to his answer. "Your sister perhaps?"

Zuko began to laugh. "Good luck. She's vicious!"

**Zuko: Hell no he is not dating my sister; she will rip his parts off. If you know what I mean.**

* * *

Po's eyes glistened in delight as the next tray rolled in. "is that marble cake?" he stuffed the whole piece down his throat. "Awesome."

"Can I get a cake that I can actually eat?" Tigress screamed.

"This one is yellow cake, with cream cheese filling." The chef set the plates in front of the couple and they tasted it.

"I like this one." Po said with a mouthful of dessert.

"You like all of them." Tigress massaged her temples.

"Any final decisions?" the chef took the empty plates away.

**Tigress: Honestly I don't even like sweets, so the cake isn't a big accomplishment for me I'll leave the choosing to Po.**

"I want all of them!" Po licked his fork clean right before the chef handed him the paper work. "We are only getting one cake." Tigress sneered.

Po looked around with worry. "But I can't choose!"

Tigress rolled her eyes in frustration and picked for him. They left the designs and everything else with the chef and headed on home.


	3. Wardrobe Malfunction

The morning was humid, the sweet smell of peaches and cherry blossoms choked the innocent slaves under Tigress' will as they over looked her wedding dress.

**Tigress: Today is my fitting, even though I haven't really picked my official wedding dress. Let's hope Kaide doesn't get on my nerves about this one.**

"Let me be the first to say, I hate these bridesmaid dresses, their revealing and I can barely walk." Rin announced.

**Tigress: Don't make me slap you Rin.**

"Well I like them, and they are not revealing at all your just extremely insecure. The fact that you guys can't walk will bring more attention to me. Because I'm the bride."

Rin snarled at her. "I don't think it's fair, we all want to enjoy ourselves. Who wants to be paralyzed by a dress all damn day?"

"You don't have a choice you're wearing it!"

**Aomi: there are a few weeks until the wedding, and Rin wants to pick fights. If the stress it too much for you imagine what it's doing to Tigress.**

Tigress' dress was being prepared in another room. In a separate dressing room a small crashing sound was heard.

"F**k! Stupid ass dress!"

**Viper: Rin is flipping out in another room, why? I don't know. She's taking this dress thing too far.**

"What the hell!" Tigress screamed. "Your gonna f**k up the dress! Are you serious?"

"Hell yes. I can't walk smart one! If you put a slit in the dress then it could be possible. Other than that f**k you and your damn dress!" Rin stripped down in front of the cameras and threw the dress to the tailor. "I'm not an insecure bitch either, remember that."

"You're being a baby Rin." Aomi murmured.

"Then let me be a baby then! F**k this stupid ass wedding!"

"You're being stupid right now you know that?" Tigress asked.

"I'm stupid? Who the hell thinks of a reception that looks exactly like their house? And spends thousands for it? Who? A dumb bitch that's who." Tigress immediately got in her face. "Don't call me dumb."

"Why not? It's true! The whole perspective of this wedding is stupid feel so bad for Po because he has to spend the rest of his life with your crazy ass!"

"Don't come to the wedding." Tigress stated.

"Ok I won't come; I'll sit my happy ass in my room and sleep all day." Rin put on her clothes, and her shoes.

"Bitch go home, get out of my face, don't talk anymore. Like just leave." Tigress pointed towards the door.

"Fine I will, have fun at the gunshot wedding guys." Rin went through the door.

Aomi looked wide eyed at tigress. "Gunshot?"

Tigress rolled her eyes. "Shut up."

**Tigress: Rin, I hope you're not waiting for me to forgive you, because that day will mostly likely never come. I better not see your face at my wedding. You have been evicted.**

* * *

Back at the Jade palace Po and the boys had just finished shopping for their attire. They haven't bought them yet of course everything must be run over by the bride herself.

"So Zuko, did you ever find that date?" monkey harshly spun and whirled his staff, slicing it through the air.

"No."

"Did you even look?" crane stared.

"No."

"Why not?" Po sat by the courtyard steps.

"I just can't" Zuko buried his face in his hands.

"Of course you can, I asked your sister and she automatically said yes." Chu added.

"You what?! What did you put in her tea to make her say that you bastard?" Zuko accusingly pointed at Chu.

"Nothing she just came home all pissed, so I waited until she cooled down then I asked her."

"How do I know you didn't threaten her life?" Zuko glared.

"What?"

"He's an overprotective older brother; it's his job to question you like that." Crane explained.

"Well, go find out what's wrong with her!" Zuko yelled.

"Isn't that your job? I mean you are the older brother." Chu spun halfway.

"Well I'm telling you to do that for me! Now go!" Zuko strictly ordered.

"As for you Zuko, you are getting a date for the wedding." Po squinted.

"Why can't I just be single for it?" he whined.

"Shut up." Po pleaded.

**Po: It's bad enough that Zuko has been left alone, but it would be worse if he was left alone surrounded by other couples.**

* * *

Chu found his way in the squeaky wooden barracks, and lightly knocked on Rin's door.

"Who is it?" the unpleasant voice growled.

"It's me." He responded.

"Go away."

"I brought food."

Rin slowly cracked the rice paper door open. "Are those sticky buns with wonton soup?"

"Your favorite." Chu smiled.

"Get in!" she pulled the startled mountain cat into her domain, and slammed the slide door shut.

"It's just food. Calm down."

"I just had the worst day. Tell me why Tigress decided that it was a good idea to make all her bridesmaids uncomfortable for her own benefit." Rin mercilessly ate a sticky bun.

"What did she do?"

"Look at this, and tell me this isn't f**ked up." She pulled out the dress she fought over out of her bamboo closet.

"That's actually a nice dress."

"Let me put it on then." Rin had no problem removing her clothing in front of Chu to prove her ridiculous point. She also has no idea that he just witnessed the greatest creation from the heavens above.

**Chu: I don't see a real problem with the dress, besides the fact that it's too tight around the ankles, the fabric fits her nicely and it's not that revealing it just hugs the curves that were carved by the gods of perfection. Damn what a body.**

"Still no problem?" Rin tried to walk around.

"Just the fact that you can't walk but other than that you look beautiful."

Rin blushed a little. "I guess I was a little harsh for no reason."

"I guess so too." He agreed.

"Do I really have to apologize?"

Chu nodded.

"Ok but red is not my color." She smiled.

* * *

YEAH YEAH YEAH I KNOW. I HAVENT BEEN HEARD OF FOR MONTHS I GOT COLLEGE STUFF TO PREPARE FOR MY BAD. CHEERS.


	4. She said WHAT!

"The food is the most important part of the reception, if you don't have food you might as well not get married. Are there any types on your mind?" Isabelle circled the categorized platters, filled with food from all over the world.

"Yeah I totally agree. We should sample these. Just to be sure. You know. Make sure it's. Perfect." Po's hungry eyes scanned the food until his they met with the caramel covered marshmallows; he immediately shoved them in his mouth.

"How long is this going to take?" Tigress angrily tapped her toes against the marble floor. "I have a fitting to go to."

"As long as you pick your appetizer, entrée, and dessert then you can leave and do whatever you want."

**Tigress: I have never been so annoyed in my life; I pretty much hate everyone right now. Like everyone. Including Shifu. Ok excluding Shifu cause he didn't piss me off. Yet.**

"I honestly don't care about the food part of this wedding; I'm leaving that to Po."

"Yes! I love you!" Po ate more food.

* * *

Rin and Aomi skipped training and decided to stay by the Sacred Peach Tree away from everyone else. While Mei Ling and Viper were fangirling over a disastrous wedding.

"I'm honestly sick and tired of this bullshit, who screams at people for no reason every time something bad happens?" Rin let her feet dangle in the Cliffside.

"You have never been in her shoes before, you have never been proposed to, and you have never had to hold an event filled with people that expect so much of you. It looks stressful." Aomi started scratching old bark off the tree.

Aomi paused. "You know Tai Lung told me something this morning. Did you really mean the whole 'shotgun wedding' thing?"

Rin nervously turned towards her as if she'd heard a bloody scream. "What are you talking about? What did he say?"

"Well he's here if you want to ask hi-"

Rin dashed down the steps violently, completely ignoring Aomi she raced toward the hall was Shifu and Tai Lung was in middle of conversation. "It's so weird to see you two behave to each other."

"Is there a precise reason why you barged in here?" Shifu glared coldly at her, as she managed to catch her breath.

"I need to borrow him for just a moment."

"And is there a reason why you need him?" Shifu stared at her suspiciously.

"I just want to ask him something; please it'll just take a second." Rin begged.

Shifu nodded approval.

Tai Lung soon joined Rin outside the kitchen. "Aomi told me that you know something. Spill"

"Well the only thing I'm going to say is that your past actions will get you killed." Tai Lung stared into her eyes in warning.

"What the hell are you talking about? What did I do that was so wrong?"

Tai Lung didn't answer her, he just handed her a folded piece of paper. She unfolded it only to find out that wasn't what it seemed. It was a magazine. Only god knows that if Tai Lung has a magazine, something bad is going to happen.

**Rin: hell no I'm not reading it now, maybe later. With a friend.**

"Did you collect them?"

Tai Lung shook his head. "This, you deserve." He calmly walked away.

**Rin: I screwed, and I don't even know what this is about yet.**

* * *

**Tigress: I'm tired, I want to go home, and sleep all day. I don't want to see Isabelle, Po, or anyone else.**

Tigress lazily dragged her feet down the hall and threw herself on the bed.

"Tigress I'm starting dinner ok?" Po peeked into the room.

"Yeah, whatever." She mumbled.

* * *

"Chu! Come here I need to talk to you!" Rin yelled.

Zuko glared at him with hate. "You better not touch her."

**Zuko: I hate the fact that Chu has a crush on my little sister; don't blame me for being protective.**

* * *

Chu slid into Rin's room, and saw her worried face. "What happened?"

"I don't know until I open this magazine. I just need someone to calm me down if I have a sudden panic attack."

"Open it."

"I can't"

"Why not"

"Because I said something that might get me killed." Rin whimpered.

"Then I'll open it." Chu took the magazine from Rin and opened it; he flipped a couple pages, and then stopped dead in his tracks. "I hope you didn't say this, she's gonna kill you!"

"What? What is it?!" Chu turned the book towards her with the following heading 'Master expecting? Forced Marriage Due to Unplanned Pregnancy' with a picture of Po and Tigress. On the next page, 'Master Rin Tells Brutal Secret'

"I'm going to die. Just kill me now." Rin panicked.

"What exactly did you say to her?" Chu sincerely asked.

"I just told her that the wedding was stupid and pointless, and that she should have fun at her gunshot wedding." Rin paced back and forth.

"Calm down, there is a positive solution for this." Chu motioned Rin to calmly sit down.

"Of course there is! let's just dig a grave for me right now!"

"Or you could just apologize."

"Dinner's ready!" Po called.

"Now what?"

"Just be yourself" Chu patted her back then left out.

**Rin: if I act myself, someone is gonna get their ass whooped.**

* * *

The masters surrounded the table, hovering over Po's food. "Where's Tigress?" Crane asked.

"She's coming." Viper slithered to her seat; everyone seemed unaware of the situation. All but Tai Lung, who kept sending looks at Rin.

"So how was training?"

Aomi brought Rin back into reality.

"Boring, Monkey just sat there and Zuko didn't even want to spar with me, only Chu." Crane lifted his spoon.

"And he was being extremely aggressive, almost broke my arm too." Chu creaked his tired muscles.

"Just don't touch my sister." Zuko glared. Suddenly all eyes were on her now, as if someone said something to her.

"What?" she asked.

"Don't play dumb." The voice was Tigress, who was standing on the doorway; with the magazine in her hand.

**Tigress: it's embarrassing to get called out in front of people, but to have you tailor congratulate you and hand you a magazine with embarrassing shit in it. I'm going to choke a bitch.**

"You know this shit is everywhere?" Tigress growled.

Tai Lung stood in front of Tigress to prevent a female brawl.

"No I didn't know that." Rin stood up.

"Why would you say that, was it out of spite? I can't believe you would talk shit behind my back!" Tigress tried to get over Tai Lung's massive body.

"Bitch I said that shit to your face! Someone just heard me say it and reported it. Don't twist anything." Rin walked over to Tai Lung and yelled at Tigress over his shoulder.

"Wow, dinner and a show?" Monkey joked.

"I want an apology. Now" Tigress sneered.

"Ok, I'm sorry you can't handle a tiny little rumor, and that you blasted it out of proportion." Rin smirked.

Tigress reached for a vase to throw at Rin, while pretty much every man in the room held her back.

"Don't worry guys; it's just her hormones acting up." Rin smiled and walked past the bundle of struggling masters as Tigress cursed in Chinese.


End file.
